- You are going to compare new dates to your past relationship. It’s inevitable, but remember, while you should continue to celebrate the good qualities about your ex, there are a lot of other reasons you are no longer with that person. And for those reasons, you don’t want someone who is exactly like your ex.
- You must have space. It is impossible to let go of someone if you are constantly seeing them. Breaking up with someone is like getting over an addiction. If you’re an alcoholic, you don’t go to a bar. If you’re addicted to shopping, you don’t go to the mall. Same principle. Put bluntly: you can’t be friends with your ex right away!
- Don’t wallow in your misery. Get up, get out and do something. Plus, if you run into your ex, you don’t want to look like a hot mess. Exercise, eat right, get enough sleep. Go out with your friends, take a class, develop a hobby. Become a more interesting person so that your ex isn’t the only thing that defines you. Throw yourself into work, stay busy. Not only will activity keep your mind off the hurt, but it will help you meet new people with similar interests to yours.
- It is impossible to get your ex back by reasoning with them. Unfortunately, we cannot control another person’s emotions as much as we’d like to. Don’t wait for them to come back; you’re missing out on other amazing people if you put all of your hope in one person. Plus, chances are, they won’t come back.
- Respect the wishes of your ex. If they say they need some space, give them that space. If your relationship is going to work out in the future, it will be important that you made it clear that you care enough to respect their desires.
- Reflect on what went wrong in the relationship. Use it to make yourself healthier for your next beau/lady. There is someone out there who will appreciate you for you.
- It’s normal to feel lost, anxious, angry, depressed, etc. Recognize those feelings and try to fix them. Don’t let yourself get so lost in these emotions that you lose yourself. Channel that energy into writing, creating, etc.
Here are some songs:
Move on to angry: Ben Folds Five “Song for the Dumped,” Kelly Clarkson “Since U Been Gone” (cheesy as it sounds, this is a really good song to sing along to), The Killers “Mr. Brightside,” Paul Simon “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover”